Tuesday, November 25, 2008

If i got chance, i won't let you be lonely anymore.

today this blog, is I want to write for someone, a friend that is important to me. Even now we hardly chat. @_@. I even not sure that he got read my blog or not, hehe.

I knew him in RO, form 3. @_@ in a private ro. i think probably thats called simonRO, if not mistaken.. with my another friend, boo. that time we were very close to each other. I thought before, we could stand for ever, stay at such situation. But when we grow we know, it is kinda impossible. Today, i view your friendster. perhaps you are the one who shouted in shout box, perhaps not. but anyways @_@, actually i hope u're not, its kinda ROU MA and GELI if you read this post ...... tian. actually i was always spy ur activities via your frenster or msn's nick , wakaka. but its seems like only can give me some clues about your life, you seems quite happy, much more leng zai, more lifes' activities with friends, not only football hehe... or may be last time also, i never really get to know more about you. Yesterday night ( today morning?) i lied on my bed, today is his birthday, (em...is HHH's) , i was considering very long, whether I should sms him or not? but , i did. at least it is still my wishes for him, happy birthday. i know he might be not happy to see my sms but, i hope he can accept the wishes. but seems like can't , he quite unlike the sms, which i can get to know by his reply. but never mind... :), shui says, anyways, i had greet him. And yea, i waste 1 hour, to think about when is your birthday, and... i realise,
i merely can remember it is on may 26th if i not mistaken. haha, now i think back , i think i really had been spoilted that time, by you and HHH. thats why i can always act so ren xing like a big kid e5

Here actually i want to say sorry to you.May be your feel is true, I did wrong last time for many reasons, i never care much for your stuff, such as when is your birthday, i never remember hardly, what you actually doing in school? I don't know much... Who you like? I guess I don't know. Your family matter... i only know a little bit, all that you told me, actually is so little. Your health? i think i knew about the hepatitis. What is your hobby? football and online games? What movies you like? Which subjects u dislike the most? I only know you lazy to study @_@ movies? i think is comedy. but all also i think, perhaps i should ask, and not only by predicting. Sorry, sei zai, i remembered u did change your msn nick for me, because one of my ex called raymond, and i don't want to see his name that time, so childish @_@ and you changed your nick to sei zai, for few years i think? Actually now i think back, you did so much for me, walk under the rain, just for the nike bag, rush to pavilion after school to pei me have dinner and sing k. Money is not the important stuff, it is about your health and time. I don't know what the hell i'm doing that time, but now i got no chance to get to know more about you or do more stuff for you anymore. it is about a misunderstanding? perhaps it is my fault to make you lost confidence in me, in our friendship. But one thing you are so wrong, I never think to make use of you, it is just, I wish to see you, but not others , when I'm alone or upset. I might not look like upset, but I did , for that time. I asked you to go out with me when kevin ask me out, because i believe you are the one who can protect me, no matter what. I don't trust him , but you, i got no reasons to have a doubt on you. i don't know to explain well, and perhaps , the misunderstanding does hurts. But it had passed, for me. I'm sorry for what I had did to you. And as you say, i still missing you while I'm walking in pavilion, but i never avoiding to go there, because i enjoy the feeling while i missing you. I like simple people, that face which smile with no others reason, just happy and joy, your smile always so big and real. even now when i think back, it make me smile. When im upset, I still will remind myself about your joke, and your words, you will be there. I still believe in that, although we never talk, hehe @_@ thick skin sia. your joke, you eat tissue, it makes me happy back even im emo. everytime u sit beside me, no matter in realife or game, i can feel your heart, and the warmess, no need words. I know you will be my side. I trust, you. and may be you are not, but until now, I still choose to trust you.

Sometimes you like pretty emo too, got many times i felt like want to msg you, says gambatte? or... take care @_@ you are having spm now. i know its kinda suffer for you, ngek ngek. Malay is important, don't fail @_@ but malay already passed . I think you got someone that you like, hoi, tunggu apa, don't siasuikan, chase or regret. even fail , don't give up! support you mentally. I guess last time i never put enough cares for you, well, i don't like the childish me before too. hehe... i don't know how to treasure, that is why this is my time to regret now, it is a lesson. i had learned from it. And hope that you could find someone in the future who will treasure you @_@.

I will never forget the day that you're wet, and felt fever for that nike bag.
I will never forget about your jokes and carings.
I will never forget about your sms when I'm totally fragile.
I will never forget how your lame jokes that cheers me up always.
I will never forget the day we sing k in red box plus, you said it's like an concert.
I will never forget about.. the english name that u made, for me... lol
I will never forget our favourite emotion, e16.
I will never forget about your big big smile.
I will never forget about the black padini and sub black shirts that you bought.
I will never forget about we watched the movie in the 1st roll and there is so damn cold.
I will never forget about we went to sakae sushi, and ate for rm120 , until can't finish.
I never forget about you say you own looks like lam fong! may be his name also raymond hehehe, it makes me always chase the series that got him now, it makes me feel thats you @_@, especially the gah hou yuet yuen story, his characteristic very similiar with you, always cares for others, but not your own... i kinda miss you, when watching it. hahahaha....and you like that songs too. everytime listen it now, i think of you. lol....yea , we should let go @_@ as you said, it had passed. but.. i still ...won't let go haha, at least for those memories

if i got chance, i will wish to know what is your feel that time? walk under the rain... do you feel cold? @_@ fever... do you feel lonely? do you feel upset when i ask you to come out? what you feel when u thought im making use of you? What you feel.. when i can't understand you? if im you, i sure will feel very lonely... sorry.. to left you there.
are you angry? are you sad? i don't know about it, now regret also useless @_@ sorry..

I will never forget about, you.
A person that is always there, when I need you, and sorry if when you need me, I'm not there.
I like you , forever, you're still my best friend. hehe... don't always only care for others, love yourself more.

Dedicated to Raymond.
From ying.

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